Therapeutic Specialties

Intercultural Relationships & Cross-Cultural Identity

For individuals and couples navigating life, love, and identity across cultures.

A woman with short blonde hair, wearing a cream-colored cardigan and pants, sits on a beige sofa writing in an open notebook with a gold pen in a softly lit room.

Your cultural identity may feel layered, conflicted, or still evolving.

Living across cultures can shape your sense of self in ways that are difficult to explain. You may feel more like yourself in one language than another, feel differently connected to each side of your family, or notice that different parts of you emerge depending on where you are and who you are with. Your identity may also carry the history of migration, diaspora, displacement, assimilation, or generations of starting over. Sometimes the question becomes less ā€œWhere am I from?ā€ and more ā€œWhich parts of all of this are actually mine?ā€

Therapy can offer a place to explore these layers without asking you to choose one culture, one country, or one version of yourself.

A man is seated on a beige cushioned bench, looking to his left, with sunlight casting shadows through window blinds on the wall behind him.

Do you recognize yourself?

Identity may carry more than one place, language, and history
  • An expat or someone living outside your country of origin

  • A third-culture kid or adult

  • Bicultural or multicultural

  • An immigrant or child of immigrants

  • Someone who has moved between countries or cultures throughout life

  • In an intercultural or cross-cultural relationship

  • Returning ā€œhomeā€ and realizing it no longer feels entirely like home

  • Someone who feels like a different version of yourself in different places

  • Someone who feels connected to multiple cultures, but fully claimed by none

  • Questioning which cultural values feel genuinely yours versus inherited

  • Navigating family expectations that conflict with the life you want to build

When Two Cultures Meet in a Relationship

Every relationship is a meeting of two different worlds. We each bring our own ways of communicating, handling conflict, expressing love, relating to family, and understanding what partnership should look like. These patterns are shaped by our families, histories, communities, and cultures.

I have a particular passion for working with intercultural and international couples. My research thesis, The Globalization of Love: Identity, Culture, and the Future of Mating, explored how culture, identity, family systems, and broader social forces shape the way we form relationships and understand love.

In our work, we stay curious about how those influences show up between you—including the ones that may be operating outside of conscious awareness. Rather than deciding whose way is ā€œright,ā€ we work to understand what each partner brings and intentionally create a shared relationship culture that feels authentic to both.

Two different passports representing an intercultural marraige.
Blue figures representing a couple coming back together.

Communication

What feels direct and honest in one culture may feel harsh or disrespectful in another. Even the meaning of silence, disagreement, or emotional expression can differ.

Family & Boundaries

Cultures carry different expectations around family involvement, loyalty, privacy, caregiving, and where boundaries between the couple and extended family should sit.

Love & Intimacy

How we express affection, closeness, independence, sexuality, and commitment is shaped by more than personality. We also bring the cultural expectations and relationship models we grew up with.

Creating a Microculture

Rather than choosing one culture over the other, couples can create a shared culture that blends both backgrounds while making space for something uniquely their own.

Stef Palumbo, psychotherapist and Registered Associate Marriage and Family Therapist.

Welcome, I’m Stef.

As a third-culture kid raised in New York, growing up in a multilingual home, and later living abroad as an adult, I have spent much of my life between cultures. Across the last four generations, each family member was born in a new country, giving me a family lineage shaped by migration, relocation, and starting over. I have also traveled extensively, built a life across countries, and am in a cross-cultural partnership myself.

I understand firsthand how layered questions of identity, belonging, home, family, and relationships can become.

Drawing on psychodynamic, relational, and depth-oriented perspectives, I help individuals and couples explore cultural identity, relationships, transitions, family history, and the ways different worlds can shape who we become.